mountains to climb

I climbed a mountain today. Well, kinda two.
The first was Mt Finlayson. I was with my fellow dog dorks, Heather and Shannon and their dogs. Saru, Lola and Chichi. It was a beautifully sunny day, but it was COLD! The climb up took about an hour and at one point I felt like I was going to die, but everyone I was with was so fit that I had to keep going.
We finally got to the top - I knew it because I could see the sun shining between the trees. As I was also taking photos along the way, I would end up at the back of the group, but Lola always made sure I was coming. She'd come up to me, give me a nose, and then run back to the others. And Saru was having the time of his life - off leash. A little never-wracking at first, but he seemed to know that it was fun time... and there were treats when he came back to mom.
And Chichi... well this girl can RUN!
She probably ran ten times as far as we walked... and she smiled the whole time. 
Once at the top we took some time for photos and to take it all in. There were lots of people, but there was a calmness. It felt incredibly peaceful.
Then an eagle flew by.  
The way down took almost as long somehow, but at the end I felt like I had climbed a second mountain.
After my l'il Suzy-dog died two weeks ago yesterday, I've been going through the motions. I've had to go to work, visit with family for Christmas and just be alive... but none of it felt right. Today, when I reached the top of the mountain, it was the first time I've felt connected back to the world. I felt like I could  make it through the sadness. I know there will still be tears... there already has been. But when I saw that eagle fly past us, I could see Suzy's beauty in the world. She's now a part of nature and I will be always be able to find her amongst the trees and forests and beaches and mountains. I wouldn't have thought of her in that way, but my husband told me about how he was able to see her beauty a couple days after she had died. I was starting to get worried that I never would see it because I've been trying to find her since then, but I couldn't... until today. 
And today will be the first of many more... so thank you friends for being a part of it.

*this blog post is an edit of the original post from January 4, 2014 which is posted to my personal website